Exhibit 547(a): yet another failed attempt at domesticity:
It used to be a cute little box o' green succulents on my desk so brown.
Kinda like this:
Sarah in our office took one look at my sad flowerbed and said, "Don't get a pet anytime soon."
To which I retorted that pets and kids scream and make noise when they need attention. Hey there's an idea. Reminder beepy microchips in the soil to remind me to water, give sun, hell I'll TALK TO the dang plants if it means they'll live longer than a few weeks!
Green thumb have I not.
Happy Friday, world.